Tracy's Current Frustrations

I taught at Hoover High School in 9th grade math yesterday. I'd love to be a teacher someday, simply because I know the value that my teachers had in my life, and I'd really like to create a change that way. I find it much easier to convince a captive audience in my classroom of my viewpoints, as opposed to trying to convince a city-full on a street corner.

That said, I'm frustrated with the public education system. These students don't want to learn. They can't even be contained. They are disrespectful, complain about having to do anything, and can't be quiet for even a few moments. This is what years and years of poor teachers and, likely, limited parental involvement has done to them. By the time I get them at the high school level, they're pretty much lost. Or are they? I'd like to think that they aren't.

I just find that my time in the classroom is spent more on keeping the behavior at a decent level, I'm not really convinced that any learning actually takes place. And maybe that's my own shortfalls with classroom management, but I also find that the teachers I substitute teach for are frazzled. They're frustrated with their inability to teach more. They're overwhelmed by the demands of the administration and their lack of getting through to the students. They don't have time to do anything outside of class or promote any other "real-world" experiences for their kids because they can't even control what goes on in the classroom.

Maybe our education system needs a revamping. A radical revamping. Or maybe I just shouldn't become a teacher. All I know is that I shouldn't have to be apologizing to my students about how much work I'm having them do. I shouldn't have to bargain, "If you just do this worksheet, I'll let you text at the end of the period." However, I find myself doing that anyway.

Students should be excited to learn. They should want to learn. They should realize that it's not just about reaching someone else's goal for themselves, but about setting their own. It's not even about a grade or a benchmark--it's about creating connections and making sense of the world around them.

No wonder I can't teach that part of it right now--I'm just starting to learn that on my own, too. I'm still sort of stuck in the "benchmarks" lifestyle, meaning I do well at achieving others' goals for myself, but am dismal at setting my own goals or realizing the importance of doing more work than is required. I still live my life like I'm in school, so how in the world should I expect my students to do any differently?

I imagine I, someday, will be a teacher. Hopefully by then I'll have learned how to prevent this mentality in myself and others, and maybe I can create some motivation, initiative, and love of learning in my future students.